Me: What color is the monster?
Jack: Purple!
Me: What color are the monster's teeth?
Jack: White!
Me: What color are the monster's eyes?
Jack: Scary color! The teeth are scary teeth too!
Me: Does the monster have long hair, like a kitty?
Jack: Yes! It is a scary kitty monster!
Me: What is the monster's name?
Jack: *thinks for a few seconds* CHAK-PARK, THE BAD WORD SAYER!
Lol! Isn't it funny that the worst thing he can possibly think of is to say "bad words"? I love how innocent that is. We passed a police man who was arresting two people on the side of the road today and Jack got so excited.
Jack: Oh Mommy, Mommy! That police man is arresting those people!
Me: Oh no! What do you think they did?
Jack: They must have said at least a thousands of bad words!
He is a trip! I love the funny things he says. We were watching the Queen's Diamond Jubilee today while we waited for my medicine at the air force base clinic and I told Jack that the Queen was about to come out on the balcony and wave to people.
Me: It is a real queen, Jacky!
Jack: Oh wow! A real queen in real life!
*Queen walks out on the balcony dressed in a cute old lady outfit and hat*
Jack: Uh...that isn't a queen.
Me: Sure she is! She is the Queen of England.
Jack: Noooooo, she is not a queen. She is a magician!!! Look at her magician hat and clothes!
Me: No baby...that is the queen. Look at her up there with those men. They are princes!
Jack: Why are those princes up there with the magician?
Me: That isn't a magician. It is the queen.
Jack: No, that is a magician.
Oh he makes me laugh!
It has been a rough few days here. Nothing about the move has been going well, ESPECIALLY the cats' health certificates. *WARNING, BAD WORDS AHEAD* Anyhoo, the vet who was supposed to do his job and get their certificates was a giant asshole and didn't do his job and they missed some deadlines. We ended up getting it fixed but it got REALLY complicated and expensive in the bargain. We spent like $1000 on the cats. Seriously. I had 3 major meltdowns today, worse that I have had in years and years. It was just about the worst day of my life so far because the vet that we went to to fix everything messed it up worse and I frantically had to call around Little Rock to find someone who knew how to do an international health certificate. I drove all of the way out to Cantrell Road to a vet who filled everything out and then rushed it to the USDA office at closing....and it wasn't correct AGAIN! At this point, I had been dealing with the vet stuff for NINE straight hours and I melted down pretty bad. I don't do that often but this is serious business and we have such limited time. I had to drive all the way back out to Cantrell Road and it took her over an hour to fix it. We are supposed to leave Arkansas in the morning and I still don't have the cat's health certificates from the USDA office here and one of the vets put Miss Junebug's age down as three weeks. Seriously? SERIOUSLY?!?!?!? I know the exact day she was born on and it is on all of her paperwork! June 1, 2005, which makes her 7 years old. There is no excuse for all of this. I don't understand why people refuse to do their jobs. Needless to say, I have had some pretty severe anxiety from all of this and I would love to take a lovely Xanex and block some of it out so that I can sleep....except the base med clinic refuses to get back to me on my flying/anxiety meds and so I will have none. So, yay! I get to face one of my worst fears twice in one day with 2 cats and an autistic 5 year old who is already upset about the move. This has all been one giant "vent" but I am seriously afraid that I am going to stroke out before we make it there.
So..............
If you read that giant block of text just now, you are a better person than me because I can't even proofread it. It makes me to nervous and angry to read it all over again. Right now, I am just taking it one step at a time. Tomorrow, I get to have my kitties back with me and they can be out of their kennels and can spend time with me again and I am SO happy about that! I get to go to Texas...meh. I kind of wish I had just gotten in the car to drive to Maryland so that I only have one flight to dread. At this point, I am just praying that we get to the hotel in Germany safely with our furbabies and I quit having shooting pains in my head and muscle spasms in my chest (like a charlie horse in your calf...except in your pectoral muscle). :/
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