Life Inside The Bounce House

:Being a parent has taught me MANY things:  babies can defy gravity by pooping up their backs, any drink that enters a carpeted area will be spilled within 13.2 seconds, children eat the most disgusting things, going to the bathroom is an invitation for everyone in the house to come hang out with you (pets included), etc. One of the most important lessons I have learned is to appreciate every moment because it goes by so quickly. And....I don't feel like I have done that very well lately. I have been so tied up with my "business" and the daily grind of taking Jack from school to therapy and from therapy to school and from school BACK to therapy,etc. that I have kind of forgotten to stop and have fun with him. I am pretty ashamed of that because I have an amazing kid. He is caring and he is funny and compassionate and brilliant beyond his little years and he deserves to be appreciated EVERY minute of every day. So from now on, I plan to parent from inside the bounce house.  Let me explain.

Life OUTSIDE the bounce house is easy. You can observe cute little moments while updating your Facebook status. You can take adorable little photos like a good mommy should. And you can enjoy watching your child one enjoy himself. Everything is neat and tidy and orderly and fine.

Life INSIDE the bounce house is chaotic and imperfect and occasionally painful and FUN! No more sitting on the sidelines and watching life passing me by for this mama...I am turning off the Facebook and the phone, keeping the camera for my own personal use from now on and concentrating on having fun with my baby. The pictures aren't perfect but the memories are.

A Fifth Birthday P"ARRRRRR"TY!

May 10!

Sometime in the wee morning hours of May 10, Jackson silently crawled in my bed and stole all of my cover. Warmed only by cats, I woke up shivering and immediately woke him to sing "Happy Birthday"! He smiled sleepily, blinked a few times and sat up and started rubbing his arms. Then he asked, "Why is it the same?!". I was confused and then he frowned at me and said "WHERE ARE MY ARM HAIRS??  WHY DO I SOUND THE SAME?!"  Apparently, he expected to go through early puberty in the night and wake up with man-hair on his arms and with a deep voice. I had to explain to him that it doesn't work that way and his body wasn't quite ready for man-hair and a deep voice and that Mommy is absolutely in no way prepared for him to have man-hair and droppage of the dangly bits. I promised him that one day he would man-hair to his heart's content and he was pleased with that notion.

We took him to Ihop for breakfast and he ate like a champ! (Is it bad that I always want to write it like "iHop"? Darn you, Steve Jobs.)  He told everyone that it was his birthday and he wore his super-awesome birthday crown. He spent the day outside playing and he even took a good nap! That night, we had fun making some pirate birthday art with his handprint.

Oh, and I had to add the awesome photo of him sleeping with his hand in the soup bowl. It is a fitting last photo of him as a 4 year old.

The day of his party did NOT dawn bright and clear. It dawned rainy, drizzly and cold. I don't know if you know me, dear reader, but please know this:

THE RAIN DOES NOT DARE FALL ON MY BABY'S BIRTHDAY PARTY!!!!!

This is a well-known fact. I put a lot of planning and time and thought into his parties and rain is unacceptable, so I wasn't worried. I knew it was going to clear up....and it did! We had the best time! The weather was sunny and cool with no humidity. Over thirty people were there to celebrate my baby's day and I couldn't be happier. He had the absolute best time in the whole world. I am so thankful to each and every person who came. The kids got dirty and played all over the house and backyard and even the adults got to play dress-up!





Time Is Making Fools of Us Again...

Time is making fools of us again. ~J.K. Rowling

So...five years ago, something pretty incredible happened to me. I met this little guy named Jackson. He was pretty big for his age but he fit perfectly in my arms, right next to my heart. He grew and grew and he went from crawling to running and jumping and giving me heart attacks every few seconds. I feel like I fell asleep with a baby and woke up with a five year old -- a funny, kind, stubborn, delightful little five year old.  I dreaded this birthday in a way because I felt like this was the all-important birthday when he became an official "big boy" and I was not ready to lose my baby.

And I didn't.

The night of his birthday, I snuggled up with my now-five year old in his bed to get him to sleep and I realized that he may be big for his age but he still fits perfectly in my arms, right next to my heart.

Happy, Happy Fifth Birthday my big boy, my darling, my sweetheart, my baby....my Jack. 

November 11 Update!

Jackson The Great

So, an update might be in order here!  Jack has continued with his therapy and we finally figured out what is going on.  On October 22, Jack was diagnosed with Asperger's and Sensory Processing Disorder.  I wasn't sure what that meant for his future but every one of his therapists has assured me that he should grow up perfectly normal and not have any setbacks (provided he receive the proper therapies).  And...things are already 1000% improved.  It is amazing. To look at his folder a month ago would be to see a sea of red faces (bad behavior) but now almost every day is a green face with the occasional yellow face thrown in once a week or so.  At home, he plays and runs and imagines and is SO much happier.  It is like I have a different kid!  I remember looking at him raging and screaming for hours and hours at a time out of frustration and anger when he was 2-3 and wondering "What is wrong with my baby??!!" and now I have my answer and my solution and it is amazing.

In October, we visited Pumpkin Patches, went to the Fair and to Fall Festivals and of course we went trick or treating on Halloween.  Jack was a pirate!  He also went on a bus on his very first ever field trip!  He went to Motley's Pumpkin Patch in Little Rock and had so much fun!

September 6, 2011

FALL -- Finally!

PTL, it finally feels like a touch of fall is in the air!!  Of course, that is because of a tropical storm but I will take what I can get!  Suddenly, it is  in the low fifties in the mornings and only going up to the high-seventies and low-eighties.  Quite a change from a month ago when it was 100 degrees + every day.  I am still running on the treadmill but I can't wait until I can run outside!  I am still losing weight pretty steadily and am within 20 pounds of my halfway point!  That probably sounds like a lot but I should hit it by Halloween and that will put me on track to be a size 4 by March/April.  Right now, it sounds like a dream but I intend to make it a reality!

Now to update about school....ugh school.  Jack seems to be doing a bit better and better every day but we still have a lot of hurdles to overcome.  It seems more likely every day that Jack has a sensory processing disorder and the good news is that there is help for that.  Other than that, he is learning new fun things at school all of the time and brings them home to share with us!  For instance, Jack has learned a pirate song and decided to give us all pirate names one night.  He named himself "CROCODILEBEARD", named Garry "SHARKBEARD" and after I asked what my name was, he looked around the room and christened me "KITTYBEARD".  Gee, thanks, lol.  His therapy continues in the coming weeks with appointments and testing on September 19 and October 1 and he has his school physical on this Thursday.  Oh joy....

Here are some photos that I took today out in the backyard:

August 30, 2011

Catching Up

So, the last thing I wrote was about being discouraged with Jack's behavior at school.  Since then, we have had our ups and downs but things seem to be improving quickly.  By Friday, the teachers were telling me that he was doing much better and he actually stayed all day yesterday!  I am SO proud of him!  Today might be a different story and they might need me to come for naptime but he is making progress and that is all I can really ask for.  He has been a SUPER joy to have around at home lately too.  No more running around when he should be eating -- he sits and eats his meals (and eats CONSTANTLY), he puts his shoes in the basket by the door and puts his dirty clothes in the laundry room.  He is content to play by himself for hours and doesn't whine and complain nearly as much.  Plus, I have SO much more time to myself.  As a reward, I have promised him a star present (present wrapped in star paper) every Friday that he is good all week.  It "magically" appears in the mailbox for him, lol. 

Grandmama visited this past weekend and Jack had lots of fun!  As usual, he loved playing in her "hotel-y room" and he was fascinated by the hotel phone. Jack has never really seen a house phone before -- only cell phones -- and the hotel phone freaked him out, haha.  I called it and he ran away but we talked him into answering it.  He told me the funniest things but the best was when he got tired of talking to me.  He would interrupt me or change the subject and say "You have reached 5-0-1-5. Please record your message after the tone. *BEEP*".  Then he would hang up, haha!!  Sooo funny!

Here are a few after school pics of Jack from last week:

August 25, 2011

Discouraged...

This week, I had to face some cold hard realities and I am just not sure how to feel.  For years, I have noticed some problem behaviors in Jack and have mentioned them to multiple people and several of his pediatricians and everyone told me that it was "probably normal and he was just a bit more aggressive because he was a big boy".  I would give anything to be able to go back and listen to my instincts and get him help 2 years ago because now I have to watch him struggle for my failings as a parent.  That is a tough pill to swallow.  Basically, I have cleared my schedule of anything (except weddings) and made myself 100% available to stay at school all day to help keep Jack in line.  We have therapist appoinments set up for testing and people approching me every day asking me if I have had him tested.  "No...not yet but it is scheduled and hopefully we will have some answers soon" has become my standard response.  In the meantime, I am not sure how to discipline.  Should I do what I have always done and spank him for disobeying....or should I try to remove him from class for a little while?  What if he can't help what he is doing?  It would be like spanking him for breathing.  Have I been doing that for years now?  I just don't know yet.  I am so anxious that I can't sleep at night and I spend all day with what feels like a brick in the pit of my stomach as I watch him unable to control himself.  I really hope that we can get some help for him and help him adjust now before it becomes even harder as he gets older.  :(